Thanks everybody for the birthday wishes!
The party the evening before was rathter uneventful but funny. We played "Activity" for adults - it was very funny to draw boobs so the others could guess the "nipple piercing". Or to describe the word "dildo" or to pantomime a "tongue kiss". Obviously very silly but we laughed tears about my brother (6'5" and clumsy) performing a "Playboy Bunny".
The come-together with my parents and grandparents yesterday was civilized but ended rather abruptly with my mom running out the door because I dared to make an appointment for both of us at a dermatologist. I don't really need an appointment but I thought it might make her feel better to not have to go alone. She has been having a really, really bad skin issue all over her face for more than a couple of years and she does not want to go see a doctor, any doctor really, at all. I tried breaching the subjects lots of times, as have the rest of the family but she becomes rude to agressive when directly approached.
Last birthday of my grandpa, he accused me of leaving my mom behind and not caring for her enough. That's really not the case but... well, you, reader of my neverending mom-issue-rants, know that. Anyway, I put the appointment down. She said: "I'm not going there." stood up and left. All other people - afraid of my mom - stood up and left, too. I was just glad that they were gone again and that I didn't have to deal with the fallout. I'm sure it'll come sooner or later anyway. How dare I make an appointment for her!
At least I can use the only thing I have "I will not talk to you or visit you before you see a doctor." against my mom. Let's see how she deals with that - I can live without her since she's always making me feel bad. We'll see how much she really cares and if her fear to go see a doctor is bigger than her need to see her daughter.